A Closed Door

A while back, I attempted something, but the proverbial door was shut. I don’t mean it closed with a gentle click. I mean it slammed so hard the walls rattled. It’s purported that in times like this God opens windows, but they appear to be painted shut.

As I reflected on it, a phrase from days gone by came to mind. Did I “get ahead of God”?

To be fair, some people use that phrase to communicate biblical ideas. They simply mean we act out of fear rather than faith (Romans 14:23b), in a futile attempt to somehow manipulate God. But for me, that phrase carries a lot of baggage that is best left behind.

Thanks to some of the false teachers who clog Christian radio, I heard a lot of bad teaching as a young adult. And a lot of those teachers talked a lot about discerning God’s will. They said I was supposed to be looking for signs and impressions. Not about sin (which is always wrong), but about morally neutral things. God had a plan, and I needed to figure it out, otherwise I would apparently be outside his will. Something as simple as failing to discern where one should go on vacation could apparently set off a myriad of missed connections, and God would be wringing his hands, thinking of all the good things he had in store for me that I missed, all because I misread the signs.

This is dangerous thinking. Just like the prosperity preacher who claims God rewards good deeds with wealth, this idea implies that God rewards good “sign reading” with easy circumstances. Did you go to the beach when God wanted you to go to the mountains? Well then, expect to be rained on every day and sprain your ankle on your way back to the condo.

The Bible teaches otherwise. John 9:1–3, Genesis 37–50, and the book of Job (not to mention the cross) all indicate that God is working even when things look quite grim from here.

I appreciate John MacArthur’s booklet Found: God’s Will  [1]. God’s will is actually simple. He wants us to be saved, Spirit-filled, sanctified, submissive, and suffering [2]. Yes, that’s right, suffering. That doesn’t mean you’re more holy if you never break a smile. But in a world hostile to the message of the gospel (1Corinthians 1:18), we will face opposition (1 Peter 3:13–18).

But if you're doing all these things? If you're saved, following God, and submissive to those placed over you?

If those five elements of God’s will are operating in your life, who is running your wants? God is! The psalmist said, “Delight yourself in the LORD; and He will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:4). God does not say He will fulfill all the desires there! If you are living a godly life, He will give you the right desires. [3]

It’s good to ask God for the things we think we need, but we need to remember that what he eventually gives us is what we need. I tried something, but it didn’t work out. It was not sinful—it was a good thing. And for now, the door is closed. If it never comes to pass, it won’t be because I got in the way of God’s plans. He just has a different plan for me.

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[1] Another book that covers similar ground is Just Do Something: A Liberating Approach to Finding God’s Will by Kevin DeYoung.

[2] John MacArthur, Found: God’s Will (Colorado Springs, CO: David C Cook), 68.

[3] Ibid, 68.

Dead Poets Society, carpe diem, and the story of my life

When I was in college, and for several years after, my favorite movie was Dead Poets Society. The story of John Keating and his students inspired me; carpe diem became my mantra. I was impassioned. I was determined. I was going to live a life that counted.

However, I was also clueless.

I wonder now, these 25 years later, if the 20 year old me with all her bright eyed idealism had been given a snapshot of her life as it would be at 45, what would she think? Would she consider her life lived to the fullest? If she saw herself on a hot day in July, for example, running errands and doing laundry and sweeping up dog hair, would she trust that she had indeed seized the day and lived a life thus far that counted?

I like to think she would, you know, being that I am that 45 year old me of which we speak. I mean, being a mom is the most important job I can do, right? And I volunteer at the crisis pregnancy center one day a week and we do good work, important work, kingdom work. And I teach women’s Bible study which certainly is not a waste of time or potential, is it? This is a full life I lead, an important life, a life that counts, right?

Sometimes I am not so sure.

I recently read Death by Living by N.D. Wilson. As I read I thought often of my younger self and her infatuation with Dead Poets Society and its invitation to carpe diem. In Death by Living, Wilson offers a similar plea to make the most of this life as we only live once then we die. Throughout the book he intertwines the stories of the lives of his grandparents and the story of his own life, who they were affecting who he is. Who will you be, he asks the reader. What story will your life tell?

As I ponder Wilson’s questions I feel much as I felt as that twenty year old sitting in the darkened theater all those years ago: inspired but clueless. What does it mean for me, for my life, to live with death as my reality? How do I make this life count? This life, here, today, this normal, white bread, middle class, ordinary, nay, even boring, life. Is there more? Is this enough? What will be the story of my life?

My pastor recently preached from Matthew 10:24-30. He too encouraged us to live a life that counted, a life free from fear. Trust in the sovereignty of God, he exhorted us, He sees the sparrows and we are of more value than they! What are we preserving our lives for? Why not pour it all out in glad risk for our Savior who loves us?

Again I wondered what this means for me and my life. Are the only courageous Christians serving as missionaries in the Middle East or dying as martyrs in the Sudan? Can a stay at home soccer mom seize the day and live boldly, daring to give all for her Savior?

I think yes and I don’t say so just because I am that stay at home soccer mom asking the questions. Sure, the Lord calls some of us to sell all and go. Maybe He is calling you to do just that. Or me.

But I think He also calls some of us to the radical and risky place of living like Jesus is real in the midst of a culture that has no need of Him what with its materialism and consumerism, its wealth and affluence, its arrogant intellectualism and laissez-faire tolerance. Here He calls us to boldly proclaim that there is something, Someone, infinitely better than, say, football or a new pair of shoes. Dare we? Dare I?

The post in its original draft ended here but I can’t help a postscript. Some of you know my friend died this week. From the moment of her diagnosis a mere four months ago she and her husband determined to humbly accept whatever the Lord granted. Even in her suffering she boldly proclaimed the true life, the better life, that is found in Christ. This audacious belief framed the story of her too-short life: Jesus is real, Jesus her only hope.

My friend knew something better, Someone better, awaited her beyond this life and she trusted Him with her life and in her death. And the life she now lives, she lives whole and full and free for all eternity with the One who loved her and saved her, to the praise of His glorious grace.

This is the life that counts.

Jesus is real. Jesus is better. Carpe diem. Sola Deo gloria.

The Gospel and the Shower Curtain Liner

After my daughter was born, the house was a mess. It didn't help that I was so tired and bloated prior to her birth. I just wanted to put my feet up and rest after a day's work rather than attempting to clean while being very great with child. The emergency C-section and the stress of caring for a newborn were the finishing touches to the dust and grime, which were the last things on my sleep-deprived mind.

A friend, who happened to have a house cleaning business, offered to get things spick-and-span. What a gift and what a blessing! But a few days before the date, I noticed the shower curtain liner. In a word, it was gross. Now my friend was an experienced mom who could completely empathize with a new mom's exhaustion. She had cleaned plenty of houses in all sorts of condition, so I doubt she would have been repulsed. She was also my sister in Christ. But pride and fear of man do funny things. I couldn't possibly let her see that I had let it get to such a state and think who knows what about my competence as a homemaker, so I did what any self-respecting person would do. I cleaned ahead of the cleaner to save face, and I still do this but in a different context.

What will they think of me if I share this prayer request or admit that I struggle with this sin? What if I  confess that I thought this or said that? What will they think if I start crying or fumble for words when I pray or don't give the "right" answer to a question? What will they think if they find out that I don't have it all together? I had better do a little scrubbing to make sure everything looks good before I let anyone see into my life.

But what does the Gospel say?

If I wanted others to think highly of me, I would conceal the fact that a shameful slaughter of the perfect Son of God was required that I might be saved. But when I stand at the foot of the Cross and am seen by others under the light of that Cross, I am left uncomfortably exposed before their eyes. Indeed, the most humiliation gossip that could ever be whispered about me is blared from Golgotha's hill; and my self-righteous reputation is left in ruins in the wake of its revelations. With the worst facts about me thus exposed to the view of others, I find myself feeling that I truly have nothing left to hide.

Thankfully, the more exposed I see that I am by the Cross, the more I find myself opening up to others about ongoing issues of sin in my life. (Why would anyone be shocked to hear of my struggles with past and present sin when the Cross already told them I am a desperately sinful person?)…

I give thanks for the gospel's role in forcing my hand toward self-disclosure and the freedom that follows.¹

Isn't this encouraging? The fact that I am a Christian and trusting in Christ alone is proof positive of my desperate state. I could never atone for my sins or attain to God's holy standard. But the Gospel declares what Christ has done on my behalf. This changes everything - not only my relationship with God but my relationships with others. So while there may still be grime on the shower curtain liner of my life, because of the Gospel…

- I don't have to clean myself up. I have been washed, sanctified, and justified. (1 Cor. 6:11)

- I have been united with brothers and sisters in a local church who are also works in progress. We are not competitors but companions and recipients of much needed forgiveness. Our unity is in Christ, so I do not have to tailor my persona to be accepted.  (Eph. 2:19)

-  My identity is not defined by the strength of my performance. Nor is it permanently marred by the scars and failures of the past.  God is renewing His image in me toward wholeness and healing. (2 Cor. 3:16-18)

- We have freedom to be honest about our sins and brokenness, which increases our love for God and for one another. (Luke 7:41-50; Eph. 4:15-16)


How does the truth of the Gospel help your relationships with other believers? Please share your thoughts in the comments.

                                                                                                                                                      
1. A Gospel Primer for Christians: Learning to See the Glories of God's Love, Milton Vincent, Focus Publishing, 2008, pp. 34-35.

Many thanks to Christie Davidson for sharing this quote at our church's women's social and leading the discussion which inspired this post.

The Son Came

To save his people

When I named my children, I thought about what their names meant, but meaning wasn't the most important consideration.  Not so with God. When God's Son, the second person of the Trinity, came into our world from his place at the Father's side, God instructed that he be named Jesus, which means God saves, because "he will save his people from their sins” (Matthew 1:21). The meaning of his name pointed to the purpose of his coming: The eternal Son of God came to save his people. This is his planned role in the Triune God's plan of redemption.

Incarnation

The first step for the Son in God's plan of redemption was for him to enter our world as one of us.  John's gospel says, "The Word"—the eternal Son—"became flesh" (John 1:14). This doesn't mean the Son stopped being God, or became a little less God (whatever that would be), for John's gospel is filled with testimony to the full deity of Jesus. Rather, the eternal Son of God was joined forever with genuine human nature, so that Jesus was—and still is—fully God and fully human in one person.

In other words, the Son became human by addition, not subtraction. He took on a human body, a human mind, and a human soul. Theologians sometimes express it like this: "Remaining what he was, he became what he was not." The term Christians use for the union of the eternal Son with human nature is incarnation.

If you're left wondering how the incarnation works, you're not alone. Wayne Grudem writes,

The fact that the infinite, omnipotent, eternal Son of God could become man and join himself to a human nature forever, so that infinite God became one person with finite man, will remain for eternity the most profound miracle and the most profound mystery in all the universe.¹

Each person of the Trinity had an active role in the incarnation. The Father sent the Son (Romans 8:3; Galatians 4:4) and the Son came willingly, "emptying himself," according to Philippians 2:7.

And the Holy Spirit? Well, it's only right that the most profound miracle in the universe starts with a miraculous conception, isn't it? The person Jesus, true eternal Son and true human, was conceived without a human father by the supernatural work of the Holy Spirit.

For Our Salvation

It's because of his miraculous conception that the human Jesus was morally pure (Luke 1:35). Unlike the rest of humanity conceived by ordinary means, Jesus did not inherit a sinful nature from Adam. This is an important detail in the fulfillment of the purpose of the incarnation. If Jesus came "to save his people from their sins," then he himself needed to be sinless. Only another human being, but one without any sin, even a sinful nature, could be an atoning sacrifice to bear our sins and die in our place. (We'll look more closely at how Jesus saves his people, including his atoning sacrifice, in the next post of this series.)

This is one reason our Saviour had to be a human being. But why did he have to be God incarnate? Because, for one, only someone who is both human and God could be the mediator who represents us to God and God to us (1 Timothy 2:5; John 14:9). What's more, because Jesus is God, he is able to accomplish everything he intends to do. He will surely save those who come to him; he can be an effective Savior because he is God.

The incarnation, then, was necessary for God to save us. The union of God and man in Jesus Christ stands at the very center of the Christian faith, because without it there would be no Christians—and no Christianity.

Definition of Chalcedon

The ancient Christians took the biblical data on the nature of the incarnate Son of God and formulated the Definition of Chalcedon, a statement of what all Christians must believe regarding the person of Jesus. Briefly, the Definition of Chalcedon teaches that Jesus has two natures, a human nature and a divine nature. His divine nature is just like God the Father's; his human nature is just like our human nature, except our human nature is sinful and his is not. In Jesus, the divine nature and human nature remain distinct yet united in one person.

Learn More

Here are a few ways to learn more about the incarnation of the Son of God.

1. Study John 1:1-18, Philippians 2:5-11, and Hebrews 2:14-18.
2. Study the Definition of Chalcedon.
3. Read up on the person of Christ in your favorite systematic theology. It's in chapter 25 of Wayne Grudem's Systematic Theology: An Introduction to Biblical Doctrine. Here's the section from Louis Berkhof's Systematic Theology. There's also a section on Christ's State of Humiliation which includes information on the incarnation.
4. Listen to The Doctrine of the Incarnation by D. A. Carson.
5. Listen to The Two Natures of Christ by Gerald Bray.

[1] Systematic Theology by Wayne Grudem, page 563.

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This post is the latest in a series of posts on truths every Christian woman should know. Here are the previous posts:

1. God Has Spoken (posted at the True Woman Blog)
2. God Is Three and God Is One
3. God Is Who He Is
4. God Had a Plan
5. God Created the Universe
6. We Are Made in God's Image
7. We Are All Sinners
8. God Saves

Wage war

I have a new blogging rule of thumb: write (if you're going to write) before checking any social media of the day, Twitter in particular. It's a mental deal, no doubt, but on the days I haven't scrolled through all that Twitter has to offer I find I write, when I write, with much more freedom and honesty.

In contrast, on the days I break that rule I sometimes find myself fighting the feeling that my blog is inconsequential and my words insignificant at best, self serving at worst.

Which perhaps is true. I mean, really, I'm a smart girl. I read my own blog and I see the stats. But, bottom line, it's not the stats but my own self consciousness, self doubt, and maybe a dash of selfish ambition that tend to read between the lines of my Twitter feed and sometimes find my small corner of the Internet to be oh so very small and oh so very pitiful.

"I'm taking a break from social media, Instagram especially" my friend confessed to me over scrambled eggs and French toast several months ago. "I just can't handle seeing everyone else's perfect lives and perfect children and perfect homes." My friend is currently persevering through a complicated and messy stage of life and the relative dichotomy between her reality and the appearance of others' perfection on Instagram was too much.

I think my friend is wise.

I suppose I'm trying, in some small way, to adopt a measure of her discipline with my new (and too often broken) blog-before-Twitter rule.

I recently read an article online about Instagram envy. Yeah, it's real and I doubt it's relegated only to Instagram. As I've already confessed, Twitter can have the same sort of effect. For some of us, it's the pictures of the beautifully decorated homes or the exquisitely staged meals that make us bitter. For me, it might be humbly acknowledging someone else's writing to be better and, maybe here's the real rub, better appreciated.

Just keepin' it real.

Years and years and years ago, like when I only had two children and those two only babies at that, I was in my kitchen listening to a syndicated talk show on the local Christian radio station. I have no idea who was being interviewed nor even the subject at hand but the guest on the show that day made a statement I have never forgotten: "Godliness with contentment is great gain but it's comparison that is the beginning of discontent."

What a revelation! Comparison gives birth to my discontent?! As I thought that morning, there in my kitchen, about the areas in my life then prone to dissatisfaction, I began to see the truth of the statement.

And not just then. It's true in today's dissatisfactions too, writing being only a small fraction thereof, the small fraction, that is, which I am willing to confess to you in this space.

Comparison kills contentment. It will either lead us to despair or puff us up with false superiority, both of which are enemies to true gospel contentment.

In Matthew 5, Jesus makes the rather startling command to those who struggle with looking at a woman with lustful intent, "If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away." He goes on to recommend cutting off the right hand for the same reason. There is, obviously, a wider application than to a man struggling with lust. We all have areas of our lives, Instagram or something else, where we battle temptation and envy and discontent. Jesus recommends what? Dismemberment? Going blind in one eye? I think, and thankfully most commentators agree with me, that Jesus is employing dramatic overstatement here in order to emphasize the point: Sin is serious and requires radical treatment.

We are to be wise and to take whatever steps necessary to put to death...what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. (Col. 3:5-6) Put it to death. Wage war, as John Piper has said. Can't get much more serious than that.

We tend to think this all a little silly, at least if we're talking about Twitter and blogging and Instagram. Silly and radical and maybe a little, well, you know, "out there." Maybe so. But did you catch what we are to put to death according to Colossians? Impurity, passion, evil desire and, yes, covetousness.

Waging war against sin and temptation and covetousness begins with the wisdom of knowing ourselves and our weakness. We must pray and ask the Lord to search us and expose us. We must be willing to be radical and to do what it takes to fight and flee temptation. Maybe my friend needs to take an Instagram hiatus. Maybe I need to curtail my social media interaction. Maybe you need to throw away the scale or stop buying fashion magazines or lay off the Internet for an extended time. I don't know your weakness but I know mine and I daresay you know yours.

Let's be wise. Let's stop comparing ourselves knowing full well that comparison gives way to discontent. Let us learn the discipline of godliness with contentment. Let us repent of our dissatisfaction that resents the gracious provision of our God. Let us learn the humble submission of gratitude and the joy of freedom that is ours in Christ. Let us glorify Him not by clamoring after the world and its fading treasure but by seeking that which is eternal, His kingdom, His righteousness.