There was a time in my life when everything was building. I was gaining: more children, a bigger home, further education, a better life. There was hope, not necessarily for big things, but for good things.
But before I got there, the tide turned. The gaining stopped and the losing began: illness, death, and children who wandered. And with the losses came a clear view inside my own heart, because there’s nothing like losing beloved people and cherished dreams to reveal the idolatry in my desires.
This is the way of our world: sin, dark hearts, illness, and death. The whole thing has been cursed. I’ve always known it, but now I
know it. I feel it in my chest every morning.
It was here, into this world, a cursed world that steals dreams and makes hearts ache, that the Eternal Son was born and grew and lived. When did he come to understand that so many innocent boys his own age had been slaughtered—and slaughtered in an attempt to kill
him? How old was he when he lost his earthly father? How did he feel when his own brothers disbelieved him? When a friend betrayed him? When his people did not receive him? Did the dark hearts around him make his heart ache?
One thing is sure: He experienced more of the darkness of our world than I will. I know the darkness of my own life, but on his cross he carried the whole dark curse.
He carried the curse to turn back the tide. He returned hope, but a better hope—the kind of hope that’s a sure thing. It’s certain hope for big things and good things: healing and life and clean hearts. It’s hope for another world—a new world. Our great gain is a sure thing because God gave and Christ gave up.
"... there’s nothing like losing beloved people and cherished dreams to reveal the idolatry in my desires."
ReplyDeleteI really appreciated that comment, Becky. A friend and I were recently discussing that when our children began to wander as teens, we began to see how there was a tendency to make "the perfect Christian family" an idol. But it wasn't until we were in the midst of the situation that we could even see we were doing this.
Thank so much for this post. I think it's one of my favourites this year.
Such a great word, Rebecca. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteBecky, this was such a poignant reminder to hold the things and people in our lives lightly in our hands and to place our hope and dreams in Christ alone.
ReplyDeleteA retired missionary from China told me the same thing many times when I was a new Christian - she had been widowed in China and left with 4 children to protect while trying to flee when the Communists took over and began burning Bibles and villages.
Your words echoed hers so beautifully today. Thank you.