Overwhelmed. Exhausted. Depressed. Panicky. Stressed. Burned out. Broken. Paralyzed. Drowning. Empty. Recognize yourself in any of these words? Maybe in all of them?
You're not alone. These are the most common words I've heard Christian women useing to describe themselves and their lives.
Whatever happened to the words peaceful, calm, joyful, content, quiet, rested, refreshed, and fulfilled? Wouldn't you like to exchange the second set of words for the first?Shona shares extensively from her personal experience with the consequences of her own hectic pace of life. Ultimately, it led to a struggle with depression. Her openness regarding her illness is among the most appealing things about Refresh. Women who struggle with mental illness often feel isolated and alone. To hear how someone else has found healing is always encouraging. In an effort to build a foundation which guards against burnout, the focus of the book lays out principles to establish a grace-paced life.
Shona uses the image of the gym: just as physical health requires a training regimen, so does spiritual health. Each chapter along the way, is a "station" in a training program. We start with a Reality Check, and then move through the remaining stations: Replay, Rest, Re-Create, Relax, Rethink, Reduce, Refuel, Relate, Resurrection.
One of the most compelling parts of the book for me was the initial step of evaluating who we are. In the chapter "Reality Check," she calls upon the reader to examine her life closely for signs and symptoms of burnout. We need to be realistic about ourselves. What may feel like standing on top of the world could actually be standing on the edge of a dangerous precipice.
In my own struggle with anxiety, recognizing my limitations as a human being was difficult, but necessary, and Shona addresses that:
Once I began to see the practical implications of being a limited, complex, and fallen creature, I began to see God differently, I saw myself differently, and I saw life differently.We don't like the idea of being limited. We are told that we should defy limits or that to refuse to live without limits is living an inferior existence. The truth is that we are limited, and I was grateful for Shona emphasizing that truth. It is often a failure to realize our limits that sends us crashing down.
In addition to promoting proper sleep, rest, and exercise, Shona also encourages us to examine who we are in Christ rather than living under false identities:
The Bible uses many different words and metaphors to describe the Christian: forgiven, redeemed, accepted, justified, adopted, heir, blessed, seated in heavenly places, sealed with the Spirit in Christ, and so on (see Ephesians 1). If I expand "Christian" by adding these grace-driven descriptions to my list, this part of my identity will have much more influence on my self-image. A grace-filled identity will produce a grace-paced life.We are often more consumed with our identity as wife or mother or are more preoccupied with our work outside the home. Our most important identity in found in Christ. We can be actively serving in the Church and still not be focused on our identity in Christ. Our identity in Christ is the most crucial one, and finding the right balance between that identity and the others may mean making changes.
Refresh is a book borne out of Shona Murray's experience. But it is not a unique experience. Her story is the story of many other women. This book is one woman's encouraging word to those who find themselves burned out and stressed out and looking for some help. Even more than that, Refresh would also help young women seeking to establish healthy habits that will be useful for a long time to come.